WARNING: This post contains mature content (and my OWN personal opinions). Be advised.
Someone on my facebook posted the above link to her wall. She's the type to instil in her kids the need to wait until marriage to lose your virginity. She's also very churchy. I tell my kids not to do anything until marriage too, but I'm not going to scorn my kids if they don't wait. I didn't wait, but I DID marry the man I lost my virginity to (only because we loved each other enough to get married and I got lucky. We've been happily married for 12 years as of this post).
Reading through this article, I see the problem with abstinence and church-involved procreation. For one thing, it teaches that sex is dirty, sinful and wrong to do, regardless of if you're married or not. It's not meant to be a beautiful act between two consenting people, and that you're supposed to feel super guilty afterwards. What kind of thing is that to instil in people when sex was (supposedly) meant for procreation? If sex had the one purpose of procreation, it wouldn't be as enjoyable as it is. It would be boring, quick and involve very little activity. Simply touch two fingers together and POOF you're done. Sexual activity is meant to be for recreation AS WELL as procreation, hence why it's so enjoyable :)
As for abstinence, it's good to teach children to wait for sex. I don't necessarily mean wait for marriage, but wait until they're old enough and mature enough to understand that sex is a grown up activity. There are ENTIRELY TOO MANY young, SINGLE mothers out there these days. Too many teenagers pregnant in high schools, flaunting their growing bellies as a fashion statement, and the latest fad to go around since the Goth Lifestyle came. Little do these kids realize how much WORK being a parent really is. I didn't have kids until after I was married, and having kids after marriage is no easier. And pregnancy is the ultimate consequence for sex. If you're not prepared for it, don't do it. If you "can't wait" (more like don't want to), then invest in proper protection!!
I may be loose with the rules in my home, but I'm strict on my views that should my daughter decide to have sex before she is ready, and succumbs to the ultimate consequence, I will NOT play "second-mommy" to her child. If she was old enough to engage in grown up activities, she's old enough to accept her consequence. I've witnessed two individuals who had taken advantage of their mother (their child's grandmother) in this fashion, and I will not allow it to happen in my home. I've also been taken advantage of by one of the individuals and know what it's like to have someone insinuate that someone else will care for their child WITHOUT asking, and have learned my lesson.
The point is...sex is supposed to be fun as recreation, but has the serious consequences of pregnancy, therefore anyone choosing to engage in it should 1) not think of it as a dirty, sinful act that God disapproves of (he created it in the first place, didn't he??) and 2) realize for every action there is a consequence so be responsible.
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